Miranda Brown

Miranda Brown is one of the best people to ever press the earth in vintage heels. A born storyteller, she can turn the mundane occurrence of squashing a cockroach in the shower into an epic battle to rival young Harry and his pal Voldemort.

She taught me the joys of roasted corn on the cob and what a real Red Sox fan looks like. She straddles the fence between "your cute, guitar wielding tomboy friend who can crack dirty jokes and keep up with the boys on tour, lugging gear at 4am on no sleep and cheffing it up in a five-star kitchen" and "exotically lovely fashion maven with a honeyed voice, a penchant for polyester and a well cultivated brain under that head of hair."

Did I mention her talent yet? Besides having graced the stages of Letterman and Jimmy Fallon with friends like AC Newman and The New Pornographers she's a world traveling talent who puts her own songs on the back burner while making million dolla wedding cakes and playing on other people's albums. I've embedded an old favorite of mine below for you to enjoy.

She was recently interviewed for a magazine because of her intriguing double life and I just know any minute she's gonna be scooped up by the devil Hollywood and I'll never see her again without bodyguards. I love my Miranda and miss her like the desert misses the rain. (I just made that up. good eh?)

As soon as Evan gets famous we're driving around the world in a floating double decker tour bus with a private nanny and sharing the bill with Miranda Brown.

EGGS: 5 days of breakfast

Eggs are a most versatile fruit. We love them here in the storms jungle and eat them at least five days a week. Breakfast is pretty much the only meal the mister and I consistently get to eat together, so I try to make it a nice big hot one, then we eat light the rest of the day.

Besides! Duke Ellington says breakfast is your "foundation meal" and do you know what he has every morning? Steak, baked potato, and a steaming mug of hot water. He's the DUKE. We should heed him.

I decided to do a post on five egg variations I've done in the last week or so, because they look pretty, are surprisingly easy to prepare and may inspire you to stop buying tacos at the gas station. Stop it.

Plate 1: This is just a giant omelette cut in twain. Filling is sauteed beef bacon, mushrooms, fresh garlic, and spinach. Use a giant non-stick skillet and fold carefully, top with sliced avocado, salvadorian crema (fancy sour cream from the ethnic market), chili-salt and love. Red pears on the side.

Plate 2: French toast sandwich! Dip fresh bread in egg and milk mixture (I like to get uncut loaves so I can make 'em thick) and pan fry with a bit of coconut oil. Spread with mascarpone (italian sweet cream cheese) and honey, then top with turkey bacon, over easy eggs and pepper. Eat with a fork, blueberries on the side.

Plate 3: Bison scramble. The end cuts of deli meats are super cheap and have tons of spices. I like to chop them up and use them as ingredients, rather than in a dumb sandwich. Saute bison bits in olive oil with fresh garlic and a couple shakes of habanero sauce, then pour an egg and milk mixture on top and cook (don't stir) until firm, flipping once. Top with mozzarella slices while still in the pan and serve with green grapes.

Plate 4: Chorizo taco hash! I buy hash brown patties in bulk and just use a couple at a time. Cook half a tube of turkey chorizo over low heat with about three potato patties and half an onion until well browned. Set aside while warming a can of pinto beans and steaming a few corn tortillas (tortilla warmers found cheap at FiestaMart, great in the microwave with a damp towel). Top the hash with cilantro, a few drops of habanero sauce and a couple of sunny side up eggs with the beans on the side and a drizzle of crema. Sliced bananas break up the saltiness well and give a cuban flair to your tacos.

Plate 5: Shayla's mexican pile. This one is my specialty. I make a super quick sauce using my immersion blender. One fresh jalapeno, a clove of garlic, salt, can of tomatillos (green tomatoes for my midwestern readers), and a handful of fresh cilantro. Green delicious. Serve a couple of over easy eggs on top of black beans and top with liberal amounts of green sauce. Wrap it up in warm corn tortillas with grapefruit on the side. Very fresh and almost healthy if you don't mind a bit of cholesterol.

That's my egg sermon for you. Always serve with coffee and loved ones. And remember kids, everything is better with butter. Happy breakfasting!

Skipping and Hopping

Today Ruby and I took some pictures for a kid store that sells cute stuff. It was kinda fun, but we were late due to mommy only sleeping three hours the night before and because I was tossing all of our clothes in the air trying to find something preppy that didn't have holes or stains. It's funny when you realize that your entire wardrobe looks like a Moroccan flea market.

Guess who was there... Jimmy Kim! We did some shots at the Plaza Saltillo train station and on some unseasonably green grass and Ruby insisted on wearing ALL the different backpacks. I guess we're models now, ya'll. Autographs: $5.

We shopped around for a birthday present for Nana, picked up the blond boys for a taco party, and played on the playground like bosses. Sunday power.

Hairs cut

child shayla: "Hey Daddy, I got a haircut."

dad: "Oh really? Which one?"


Every. Single. Time.
Not funny even once.

I think I may be taking after him because I love jokes that aren't funny. My favorite?

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?




wait for it....



"WHERE THE !%#@?*#-S MY TRACTOR??





Anyway, now that you've finished rolling on the floor you can check out my skills of a hairscissorist. I was trying to grow out Jesse's locks because they're fancy and golden and because there's only a short window for me to be in charge of it (before he decides it would look sweet with the word 'tramp' shaved in the side), but then he started to look like a partridge family drop-out so I tackled him with a spray bottle and dull craft scissors.


He was very squirmy and well, it's shorter now and I can see his cute ears, which I was missing.

moral of the story is...

Be nice to your mommy or she will give you dumb haircuts, take photos, and post them on the internet.

Snips'n'Snaps

Rest in Peace Etta James, we will never forget your legendary voice.

kangaroo paws

my Jungleman

watering my dormant fig tree

...in an amazing hoodie

lawn loot:the price lowers with the sun!

5th street lady's eternal smile

I didn't mean to, but I think I made Grimace.

SugaRoo

babies tugging on my skirt trying to keep me home from work

someone spilled a cat on my couch

*Etta photo source

Island Hopping

One of my favorite games as a child was "carpet is the ocean/hot lava, pillows are boats, furniture is islands". It's perfect for wet days and exciting to jump from boat to boat in the penguin, blow fish, whale shark, alligator infested waters. We wore our boating adventure attire and swam like champs through the foamy shag, scrambling to land dripping with smiles and rescuing naked baby dolls from a soggy demise.

Warning:
1. leather pillows are slippery as cuss
2. leaping like an antelope in your imagination can quickly become eating it like a 6 foot drag queen in platforms